Chapter 5
Luke
I stepped off the plane and made my way through the airport check-points and headed to duty-free where I bought a bottle of Moet and some perfume. I was fully expecting Dani to be waiting in arrivals, so I scanned the crowd trying to catch a glimpse of her long dark blonde hair that was streaked with highlights to give it a sun-kissed natural effect.
There was no sign of her, which I thought was strange, but maybe she was waiting in the car park. I took out my mobile and called her but it went straight to voicemail: Hi, this is Dani, you’ve probably guessed I’m quite busy so leave a message and I’ll get back to you.
“Hey, babe I’ve just landed and half expected you to be here. Are you? Are you sitting in your car laughing at me? Anyway, I’ll hang around for five minutes just in case you’re running late. Ring me. I’ve missed you.”
I finally jumped in a taxi after waiting almost fifteen minutes and smiled at the realization that Dani was probably waiting in the apartment for me, hopefully in bed and naked!
I opened the door and a blast of hot air and a repulsive stench hit me like an invisible wall. Fuck, I must have left the heating on, but I could swear I’d double checked everything before I left. Maybe Dani left it on accidentally. I dropped my cases and bag in the utility room noting the strong smell of fish. For fuck’s sake, it was absolutely stinking and why fish?
I opened the door to the lounge and covered my nose and I stared at the sight in front of me. At first, I was rendered dumb because it appeared that my carpets had grown, and I mean actually grown.
There was grass growing from my expensive cream carpet and the overpowering smell of fish was distracting me as I was trying to figure out what the fuck had happened since I’d been away.
I found a note on top of the lamp table with a photograph attached to it from Dani.
I hope she was worth it! It read.
Well, that explained the lack of contact then!
I got my phone out of my pocket and called her.
‘Dani, what the fuck are you playing at? I came home to a fucking grass carpet and a stench of rotten fish. Your note doesn’t even make sense because I haven’t cheated on you. You can replace this carpet, you crazy little bitch! Ring me within an hour or I’m coming over.’
I was fucking furious. Those carpets had cost me almost two thousand pounds and now I’d have to rip them up and start again. There’s one thing I had learnt about Dani, when she wants to make a point, she sure as hell does it well.
I punched a number into my phone. “Mick, come over will you mate? I think I’m going to need your help.”
I opened all of the windows to get the stench of fish out. I had no idea where it was coming from but I knew that there was no way I would be sleeping here tonight.
The doorbell rang and I walked across the bizarre grassy floor and I was pissed off that it wasn’t Dani, but immediately felt relieved because I may have strangled her.
“Fancy moving some furniture, mate?” I asked Mick.
“Erm, yep sure thing, but move it where? Have you sold up without telling me?”
“Come in and look for yourself, Mick.”
“Fuck me!” He exclaimed before falling about laughing. “What is going on in here? And what is that smell?”
“Dani decided it would be funny to spread birdseed over the carpet and water it, I’m guessing. Turn the heating on and boom baby, Wimbledon! I have to hand it to her; she well and truly made her point. She saw the picture of me on Instagram with Tahlia, the busty chick from Prague, and I guess she wanted to stamp a message of don’t fuck with me all over my house. As you can see, it worked. Fucking bitch is gonna cost me a fortune.” I said smiling, despite my anger.
“Bro, seriously, what is that smell? Did she leave a dozen kippers behind? Takes your breath away, mate.” Mick roared with laughter as he stuck his head out of the window searching for air that was breathable.
“I’m hoping it’s the carpets and the quicker we get them out of here, the sooner we get rid of the smell.”
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